More Musings on Aging or: Help! I Suddenly Became An Old Lady

Well, this “old age thing” happened! I had been on quite a high back in the spring, due to some wonderful personal experiences. My train ride and Boston adventure back in late April, were simply fabulous! Every aspect exceeded my grandest expectation and I must admit, I enjoyed the people we met, the energy of the city, and every bit of the pampered service and personal attention given to me and my niece throughout our stay at The Lenox Hotel. The nice room I had reserved was upgraded by the hotel upon arrival, and we had an elegant corner room with view, fireplace and plusher furnishings. Yes, we did indeed call every evening for a fire to be lit as we relaxed and sipped our wine in the evening after full days of museums, strolling, and meeting up with extended family members. The Lindt candy store right next to our hotel entrance ensured we had five days of hotel perfection and sweet confection! What a combination!

In May, I gave a late afternoon talk about blogging to my fellow residents and how I got into it. As much as I enjoy talking one on one, I am not a public speaker and thus was overjoyed when I found a most receptive audience who made me feel very comfortable. I read some of my blogs aloud and received an enthusiastic response. Life was good. I was filled with contentment and was a happy camper!

And then, my world changed in an instant! Thirty minutes after I returned to my apartment, I had a split second feeling that I was passing out. Next thing I knew, I came to, lying on my side, bleeding from a cut lip, sandals scattered, hair (wig) askance, and shaken to say the least. After doing a quick assessment, I was able to arise, clean up and take stock of what happened. I was alert, in no discomfort and discovered my heart rate had dropped to 37. Since I have no desire to set any longevity records, have had a very happy life, and am a definite control freak with strong opinions regarding end of life options (I have a signed DNR and legal papers), I chose to ride it out and let nature take its course. (I rather hoped the heart would continue to slow and eventually stop in my sleep.) Well, let us just say I awoke the next morning and still had a heart rate of 37. I shall spare you the details but I eventually ended up having an emergency pacemaker inserted that day. Tests done in the ER showed my heart was quite strong but the electrical circuit was blocked. Apparently, despite my rather dramatic scenario, it simply wasn’t my time yet. The procedure went well, I was back home the next day, all the Lott offspring ignored my protests and overruled me, by each coming on scheduled days to stay with me, ensuring I was never alone until they were convinced I was doing well on my own. They pointed out that whether I liked it or not, I was old! (Bless them!)

The most difficult aspect of that event was the unexpectedness of it. We Control Freaks do not like surprises! No history of cardiac problems, and even now with the pacer, I am not under the care of a cardiologist per se. I only will see the pacer team and surgeon annually to measure the efficacy of the pacer. (I have a “magic machine” which just sits on a table but somehow records and stores my cardiac function and every three months the data is retrieved remotely by the pacer team for analysis without me doing a thing or even being aware that it is operating. Amazing!)

A month later, I lifted a heavy object, and as I straightened up, I both heard and felt the snap of a lower lumbar vertebra. Having had past experiences with degenerative disc disease, and fractures, one would think I’d know better about lifting things, but it just proves that even with the “wisdom” one acquires in one’s later years, one is still capable of doing dumb things! It is no secret that healing of bones and ligaments etc takes longer as one ages, and I can vouch for that. The injuries caused problems with comfort levels and mobility. Use of meds, crutches, then a cane, were of little use and I now use the ultimate tool of the little old lady— a rollator! Hate to tell you what that did initially to my psyche but comfort and mobility took precedent over pride! I didn’t feel like doing much of anything, not

even blogging, hence why no new blogs have appeared since April.

These “golden” years are turning out to be just tarnished brass and as I draw closer to the completion of my 86th trip around the sun, I realized my children were correct—I am old! Not just old, but a cranky old!

I became very introspective and watched a lot of tv news and read many newspaper articles. Talk about depressing!! It made me realize how so much has changed in my lifetime. I miss the simpler days of the past, where there was a common sense of duty and respect. I am outraged daily by the acceptance of low standards in almost everything, from work places, to the stifling of a meaningful education for all our youth, to the polarization of our country, and the corruption in all three branches of government by both main parties. I have outlived most of the friends that were so much a part of my life. My address book now has more names crossed out due to death, than those who are still alive and cognizant. The world I lived in has disappeared and the breakneck speed of technology is becoming

more challenging to execute every day. Our social mores, entertainment, and ideals are unrecognizable. Communication amongst the younger generations is done thru texts on their phones, which has its own abbreviations and shorthand. It is like a foreign language to me. Hand-written letters, short notes, mailed greeting cards, even e-mails are really old fashioned and nearly extinct. Don’t even get me started on the topic of social media! Facebook is still used by grandparents and other boomers but things like tik-tok, snapchat, instagram, and you-tube are the “go-to” preferred method of the young. I will never, ever, understand the lure of “the influencers” whom our younger generation follows by the millions. And what is their claim to fame that have caused them to be so influential? Beats me! They certainly aren’t lifting humanity to a higher level of achievement. How about the increasing number of scams? Due to the split second ability to reach millions of people, they can be located on the other side of the globe and thus difficult to locate and prosecute. As a result, those of us who legitimately use online services have to go through more layers of security. With aps that can alter photos, and voice duplication ability rapidly advancing, it’s harder to know who/what is real or fake. Nothing seems to be illegal. There’s even a site online that tells and shows one how to shoplift!

There was an ad years ago that had a famous tag line: “Where’s the beef?” My tagline now is: Where’s the outrage?

Well, it felt good to write again, even if it was a rant! Ya’ll take care!